15.Jul.2010 I’m Totally Jealous Of This Guy

My wife left town for two weeks- she does this every year. This means that I have to fend for myself- in the kitchen. “No problem!” I think.

So it’s off to the store I go, I come up with something on the fly that I can cook once and continue eating for a week. I get rice pilaf, veggies and some chicken.

I cook the chicken, dice the veggies, drop in the rice, yadda yadda. Everything is going great. Just as I’ve combined all of the ingredients and I start stirring the pot, I notice the smell of burning plastic. It’s coming from the burner.

Our burners tend to stink when you turn them up anyway,and I noticed a small chunk on it. That’s when I noticed the dimple in the plastic spoon that I was using to stir the pot. Sure enough- I somehow managed to touch the spoon to the burner, then stir the food.

I figured that not much plastic could have gotten in there, and I let my meal simmer for the required hour.

Literally my first spoonful of this meal had a pellet of plastic in it. I had hoped that was all. I had a bite or two, then I found a streak of plastic. Maybe that was all of it. I still hadn’t eaten any plastic at this point- at least not enough to taste. Then I finally got a taste of it, and decided that the whole pot of food was tainted.

So, I have a few choices at this point- buy all of the food again, and try cooking the same meal without burning it. (It ended up being a bit bland, so maybe not). I could go a whole different route, and not cook mass quantities…. I could find food that doesn’t require cooking… well, basically, the world is my oyster, so long as I am capable of cooking it. But I don’t want oysters- they’re yucky! I could probably starve myself, then tell my wife how amazing apidexin is.

I’m think I’ll just get a bunch of raw vegetables and some ranch dip and call that a meal for the next week or so. At the very least, I’m not going to try cooking anything large for a few days. And if I went to the grocery store tomorrow and bought all of the exact same stuff, I bet they’d think I was a little crazy.